ostatnio bardzo zle sie u mnie dzieje...

ciagle sprzeczki z Miskiem...

w domu totalna masakra...

od dwoch tygodni non stop kloce sie z matka...

dla niej jestem narkomanka, alkoholiczka i kurwa...

nie radze sobie z ta sytuacja...

ciesze sie, ze sa osoby, ktore staraja sie mnie pocieszyc w tym momencie i chociaz troche rozweselic...

chociaz jest to cholernie trudne...

co prawda ostatatnio mialam taki dzien, ze mialam dobry humor, bylam wesola...

do momentu, kiedy weszlam do domu...

trzeba sie stad wyprowadzic...

koniecznosc...

nie ma innej mozliwosci...

przynajmniej nie teraz... juz nie...

myslalam, ze cos sie zmienilo w jej podejsciu do mnie, ale jednak nie..

jednak jest tak samo, jak bylo zawsze...

mam juz tego dosc :(

jedyne co mi pozostalo, to tylko cadzienny placz...

a co..

w koncu to chociaz troche pomaga...

bardzo malo, ale zawsze cos...

a tak poza tym, to cholernie tesknie...

choernie potrzebuje...

potrzebuje ciepla, wsparcia, bliskosci...

niestety ostnio tego nie dostaje...

tak wiem, tez tego nie daje...

wybacz, ale nie mam sily teraz dawac ciepla i wsparcia...

spadlam w ogromny dol i probuje sie z niego wydostac...

jest to cholernie trudne..

tym bardziej teraz...

kiedy jestes gdzies tam...

kiedy nie dostaje wsparcia...

kiedy tak naprawde ten dol sie caly czas powieksza...

So, so you think you can tell
Heaven from Hell,
Blue skys from pain.
Can you tell a green field
From a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?

And did they get you to trade
Your heros for ghosts?
Hot ashes for trees?
Hot air for a cool breeze?
Cold comfort for change?
And did you exchange
A walk on part in the war
For a lead role in a cage?

How I wish, how I wish you were here.
We're just two lost souls
Swimming in a fish bowl,
Year after year,
Running over the same old ground.
What have we found?
The same old fears.
Wish you were here.

Hey you ! out there in the cold
Getting lonely, getting old, can you feel me
Hey you ! Standing in the aisles
With itchy feet and fading smiles, can you feel me
Hey you ! don't help them to bury the light
Don't give in without a fight.
Hey you ! out there on your own
sitting naked by the phone would you touch me
Hey you ! with your ear against the wall
Waiting for someone to call out would you touch me
Hey you ! would you help me to carry the stone
Open your heart, I'm coming home
But it was only a fantasy
The wall was too high as you can see
No matter how he tried he could not break free
And the worms ate into his brain.
Hey you ! out there on the road
Always doing what you're told, can you help me
Hey you ! out there beyond the wall
Breaking bottles in the hall, can you help me
Hey you ! don't tell me there's no hope at all
Together we stand, divided we fall.