Big shame to share photos like this... but i don't have any normal. I think i have to get some, somehow... It's next day, still ignored by friends and close persons that used to make me happy or feel better. I don't know what i have done to push them away but i think i have to do it harded to make them see that it's pain for me too. I think i have to use all the hate i gain from people as a motivation to move my ass and do everything to make them be jealousy and make myself to be proud of me.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GoCOg8ZzUfg