always summer

You're in a car with a beautiful boy, and he won't tell you that he loves you, but he loves you. And you feel like you've done something terrible, like robbed a liquor store, or swallowed pills, or shoveled yourself a grave in the dirt, and you're tired. You're in a car with a beautiful boy, and you're trying not to tell him that you love him, and you're trying to choke down the feeling, and you're trembling, but he reaches over and he touches you, like a prayer for which no words exist, and you feel your heart taking root in your body, like you've discovered something you didn't even have a name for.

myślę myślę myślę myślę myślę myślę myślę myślę i co gorsza liczę dni godziny minuty, liczę pieniądze (których nie mam, tak bardzo drogie kilometry) i godziny w pociągach, patrzę w ten kalendarz, patrzę w te nadchodzące tygodnie i same dworce i perony; śnieg, śnieg, śnieg, czapki, spacery, lampki choinkowe, latarnie w parkach; miałam sobie poradzić tak pięknie; jest jeszcze piękniej; tylko że nie, nie, nie, jest rozmazany atrament w tak starych zeszytach; jest powidzki taras i let her go, gwiazdy i medyceusze, fear no more the midnight, fear no more the sea, close your eyes, regret nothing; you're safe with me. look into the shadows, step into the mist, search your land but doubt never; I still exist

my moves are slow but soon they'll know