betrayal

In new 2013, I wish all of you guys to be happy and healthy, but the most important: to take responsibility for your own actions and find love (the only one you need). I wish you faithful lovers, greatest friends, beloved families and people who respect and accept you for the way you are. I hope all my New Year's dreams will come true and I'm starting from now to believe in myself and keeping the faith for better tomorrow. Hope is the thing we all need and in healthy doses it will make our lives brighter. My biggest resolution for this year is to pass my exams and succesfully apply to college. In my opinion, life would start then for good. Sometimes I feel I pissed off my own fate, 'cause it gives me kicks every single time I try to get higher than I was before. Today, I found out I've been cruelly betrayed and my first question to that is: why? Why, god dammit, when I'm loyal enough to fight and try to make happy someone who cares about me, people are treating me like some piece of shit that got sticked to their shoe? Like I was worth not a penny, like I don't deserve to respect me for who I am and for what I do. Times like this I'm getting stuck in my own head, wordering what fucking karma is punishing me for whole my life. I'm tough, I know it. I knew from the beginning that I will be the one who have to be oneself saviour. Maybe that's why I never really do give up. That's why I still trust and still getting hurt. That's why I still laugh. You know, sometimes, when it comes to thinking about all the horrible things that happened to me, I realise, that my life gave a fuck many more times than people's all around me. But, suprisingly my life gave me so much joy and happines that helped me get through this sea of shit. Well, tonight I'm vulgar as hell. Maybe that's the moment when my gates of hell are getting wild open and inviting me to play a game inside. It's kind of rude to be so negative-minded on this priceless day, so... Don't you all give a fuck this year. Oh, I almost forgot: LET THE BEAUTY COME TO YOU AND MAKE YOU ALL MORE BEAUTIFUL EACH AND EVERY DAY FOR THE WHOLE 365 DAYS! Dear Santa, what if I'll be naughty for another one year? Take care, y'all!