186 dni

i used to think i couldn't go a day without your smile.
without telling you things and hearing your voice back.

then, that day arrived and it was so damn hard, but the next was harder.
and i knew with a sinking feeling it was going to get worse and i wasn't going to
be okay for a very long time.

because losing someone isn't an occasion or an event. it doesn't happen just once.
it happens over and over again. i lose you everytime i pick up your favourite coffee mug;
whenever that one song plays on the radio, or when i discover your old t-shirt
at the bottom of my laundry pile.

i lose you everytime i think of kissing you, holding you or wanting you.
i go to bed at night and lose you, when i wish i could tell you about my day.
and in the morning, when i wake and reach for an empty space across the sheets,
i begin to lose you all over again.

~Lang Leav           

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r5yaoMjaAmE